Oregon Trail II
Was way too high-tech for simple minded wagon folks.
“Challenge the Unpredictable Frontier!”
I wondered if a CD-ROM version of Oregon Trail II would still run on my new-fangled computer. So as I loaded it up I checked out the system requirements.
- Microsoft Windows 3.1 or higher.
Check. Wait, I’m not sure if Vista is considered higher. It doesn’t have a number. Unless, Vista is like some numbers puzzle I have to solve. I’d go with … V=22, I=9, S=19, T=20, A=1 meaning Vista was version 2291920. That’s looks like a long version type, it actually looks more like a phone number. I tried calling it. It’s a fax machine. Fax machines must be higher than 3.1. We have to be cool.
- 256-color SVGA display.
Shit. Don’t have that anymore. We may be fucked here.
- 12MB hard-disk space.
Ouch. Vicious. I didn’t know if my computer could possibly spare that. So, I called MECC Technical support with the ‘612’ area code they provide me with in the manual. Minneapolis, Minnesota. Nobody is fuckin’ answering. This is bullshit. Why ofter a customer service with no hours indicated and not pick up the phone? In the 15 years, since the manual’s copyright date, have our morals seriously dropped this low? We can’t even honor things we put in place 15 years ago, how can anyone have faith in things we once believed in the past? What is Almond Joys didn’t have nuts, and Mounds did? Would that change their business scheme at all?
No. It wouldn’t, because coconuts are evil no matter which way you slice it.
PS - Looking up “evil coconut” in google lead me to a very weird page. Swift WindRider’s Evil Coconut Guide.
If you have the time, read through that website, it’s about unicorn’s & evil coconuts, blew my mind.
